I went to take the trash out the other day and came back to the little eager beaver smooshing his face up against the storm door, wondering why I couldn't have taken him along for the ride. At least that's what I assume he was wondering. It may have been something more along the lines of "Help! Get me away from these crazy people!"
I saw his little silouette in the distance and approached slowly, watching him get more and more excited each time I popped up a little closer. When I finally made it to the door, I put my hands up to his and gave him a kiss through the glass, making him jump up and down and smile from ear to ear.
It made me realize the best thing about being a mom- you can be totally yourself, everything you do is funny, and they really truly need you more than anything else in the world. You are the best thing that ever happened to that little boy or girl (and vice versa).
You would think that would be a lot of pressure, but it doesn't feel like that at all to me. It has made me confident, calm, and almost fearless. I don't think about what could happen to me anymore; I just concentrate on what is going on with him.
For someone who spent the better part of her life anxiety ridden and worrying about her impending doom, it's something totally different for me. I'm in mommy protective mode and it feels really good to care about someone else more than myself. I haven't had a panic attack in almost 2 years now! Who would have thought a baby could de-stress your life?